Weigh In: May 2020
Starting Weight: 25 stone, 13 pounds.
Previous Weight: 23 stone. 12.6 pounds.
Well, this isn't good. A quarter of a stone gain moving me back over 24 stone and moving my total loss under two stone. It has been a pretty dreadful month and I don't honestly know what to say about it other than I have totally lost all desire and motivation. I've moved with ease back into my old patterns. When I'm sad, I eat. When I'm bored, I eat. When I can't cope, I eat. I have accepted that I'm probably going to live with depression for the rest of my life, but I'm never all that certain whether I'm just using it as an excuse for days and weeks and inaction. Nonetheless, a thousand negative thoughts are keeping me up at night at the moment.
Similarly, any forward impetus I might have had to exercise has long since evaporated. Throughout this period I've done my best to shield my parents from potential risk as much as possible, which has meant walking in largely underpopulated areas. Those areas are mostly the streets immediately around my house and going round in circles eventually loses its appeal.
I am still uncertain as to how to move forward from here. It feels like a good many people now are acting as though the lockdown has been entirely lifted and given the cavalier attitude of one of the government's advisors, I cannot blame them entirely. I feel that the much discussed 'second wave' is now much more likely than not. But then I am very much a pessimist by nature.
In an effort to finish this blog on a less depressing note, I suggest you check out Gavin Osborn's new single 'Born In The NHS' available on Bandcamp here. I've been a fan of Gavin's funny, whimsical musical stylings for years and also can heartily recommend 'Echo Bridge', a quasi-concept album based around his home town of Keynsham and written in response to the 2016 referendum result.
Previous Weight: 23 stone. 12.6 pounds.
New Weight: 24 stone, 2.2 pounds.
This Month's Gain: 3.6 pounds.
Total Weight Loss: 1 stone, 10.8 pounds.Well, this isn't good. A quarter of a stone gain moving me back over 24 stone and moving my total loss under two stone. It has been a pretty dreadful month and I don't honestly know what to say about it other than I have totally lost all desire and motivation. I've moved with ease back into my old patterns. When I'm sad, I eat. When I'm bored, I eat. When I can't cope, I eat. I have accepted that I'm probably going to live with depression for the rest of my life, but I'm never all that certain whether I'm just using it as an excuse for days and weeks and inaction. Nonetheless, a thousand negative thoughts are keeping me up at night at the moment.
Similarly, any forward impetus I might have had to exercise has long since evaporated. Throughout this period I've done my best to shield my parents from potential risk as much as possible, which has meant walking in largely underpopulated areas. Those areas are mostly the streets immediately around my house and going round in circles eventually loses its appeal.
I am still uncertain as to how to move forward from here. It feels like a good many people now are acting as though the lockdown has been entirely lifted and given the cavalier attitude of one of the government's advisors, I cannot blame them entirely. I feel that the much discussed 'second wave' is now much more likely than not. But then I am very much a pessimist by nature.
In an effort to finish this blog on a less depressing note, I suggest you check out Gavin Osborn's new single 'Born In The NHS' available on Bandcamp here. I've been a fan of Gavin's funny, whimsical musical stylings for years and also can heartily recommend 'Echo Bridge', a quasi-concept album based around his home town of Keynsham and written in response to the 2016 referendum result.
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